


He'll Never Know.

by cherri_cola (orphan_account)



Category: Big Hero 6 (2014)
Genre: Angst, Depression, F/M, M/M, Sad, Unrequited Love, hidashi, one sided hidashi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2015-06-21
Packaged: 2018-04-05 09:03:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4173978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/cherri_cola
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An unrequited love for an older brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He'll Never Know.

**Author's Note:**

> since ive written a load of fluff for this ship, I decided it was time to bring in the angst. So enjoy the one shot bro.

Hiro had never felt anything more painful than the feelings he’s been trying to keep hidden. They were something he shouldn’t be feeling, love for someone he isn’t allowed to have. Not only were they already taken but they’re his older brother. That’s something that shouldn’t even cross his mind. Ever since he had been frequenting botfights, the feelings had been growing stronger and he couldn’t help it. His older brother who’d never hurt a fly, his older brother the most beautiful person in the world. He sighs as he rolls over in his bed, he couldn’t sleep, he could never sleep. He always got no sleep, but sometimes he’d manage to fall asleep straight away. He wouldn’t wake up for at least nine hours. He sits up, rubbing his eyes, as he gets his other pillow from the ground and hugs into his chest. A tear starts to fall down his cheek, he’s been crying so much recently, maybe…maybe he should just run away, die even. He’s disgusting. He hadn’t been taking his pills recently either, he told everyone he was better, and both Aunt Cass and Tadashi believed him. 

 

Tadashi could hear muffled sobs coming from his younger brother’s part of the room. He knew something was wrong, he wanted to walk over, ask if Hiro’s okay. He knows though, he knows that if he did that, his brother wouldn’t appreciate it. Hiro had been acting weirdly and he had stopped taking his meds. Tadashi had been out with Honey a lot lately as well, he couldn’t completely ignore his family, but he couldn't completely ignore his girlfriend either. He hated not being with Hiro as often any more. Whenever he felt he needed to be home and had asked Honey if he could just stay at home, she’d just go off about how he should spend just as much time with her as with his brother. He turns over in his bed, turning away from the noise of his younger brother as he just looks to the wall. 

 

*~*

 

Hiro had no idea what he was even doing any more, he couldn’t understand anything. It was around seven in the morning. He didn’t want to get out of bed, he doesn’t want to go to school, he wants to lay in bed, sleep and just not do anything but stare at a wall. No one understood though, how hard he finds it, just to get dressed and go outside. He hated it all, he saw nothing positive in his life. He had one thing, but that was taken, and unachievable. His sunshine was  just an extremely dull glow at the end of a tunnel, nothing compared to the bright shine it used to have. He felt someone pat his head, 

“Hey, time to get up now.” He hears his older brother say softly, he feels butterflies. Some sort of warmth spreading throughout his body, but he still can’t bring himself to get out of bed. He just brings the covers closer towards him, willing himself to disappear. As Tadashi leaves his little brother behind, he puts the younger Hamada’s pill bottle on the boys desk. The desk itself is messy, half finished robots and machine parts scattered everywhere and an old sketch book Tadashi had never seen before had been left next to the computer. 

 

Hiro stayed in bed almost all day, he had to get up to take a shower before Tadashi got home. He walks past the desk, noticing the orange bottle with the prescription strip stuck to the front of it. Maybe he should take one or two, maybe he should, they barely helped but maybe they might. He opens the bottle and pours two into his open palm before walking into the bathroom. When Hiro gets into the bathroom, he puts the two tablets on the sink and fills up the cup next to it. He quickly throws the two pills down his throat, and swallows them, gulping down the cup of water. It didn’t make him feel any better, he still wanted to curl into a ball and cry. He still had no motivation, he still had _those_ feelings. He was tired, emotionally drained, he was sick of it all, so he opens the cupboard beneath the sink, and finds them in the very far back, behind the rows of toiletries, his blade.

 

*~*

 

Hiro steps out of the bathroom, bandages all up his arms. He just throws on one of Tadashi’s shirts, the older boy had given it to him as a gift. It smelt like Tadashi, a mix of coffee and cinnamon from working in the bakery on the weekends. He smiles sadly to himself. He hates not being able to be with Tadashi. He can’t stand it, it drives him crazy, but the whole idea of it, it’s disgusting. Brothers can’t like brothers, he shouldn't even be thinking about it. 

 

Hiro hears the door open and a cheery voice,

“Hey Aunt Cass.” and he just feels those butterflies in his stomach again. His voice, just his voice and so much more is what Hiro loves about Tadashi. He hears a second set of footsteps coming upstairs behind his brother. He just had gotten back into bed as the two come into the shared room. 

“Hi Hiro!” He hears a girl say, he says nothing back, he can’t bring himself to reply. He’s shaking underneath his covers, Honey Lemon confused at _why_ she isn't getting a reply. 

 Hiro feels his breathing getting heavier, he can’t stand being around these people, he feels suffocated. He wants to scream, to shout, _I LOVE YOU TADASHI! WHY’RE YOU WITH HER AND NOT ME?!_ but he can’t do that. He just manages a weak and small

“Go a..away.” It wasn’t choked, it was just…weak. It sounded like someone had beaten the words out of him. 

 

When Tadashi hears those words from his younger brother, he was concerned, scared even. He didn’t what made Hiro say that. What if Hiro had relapsed, what if he’d completely lost himself again? He doesn't want to think those things, he knows Hiro wouldn’t. He can still be scared though, right? He can still care. Honey Lemon tugs his arm, trying to pull him away from his younger brother. He doesn’t want to leave the younger Hamada, he stays there. 

“Tadashi, not this again.” Honey exasperates, crossing her arms, “You already spend enough time with your family and worrying about them. What about me? I’m your girlfriend. Remember? You asked _me_ out.” Hiro wants to shout, to tell her to shut up and stop being such a bitch but all he can get out is the same, weak and breaking voice from earlier,

“Please..leave me alone, if you’re going to fight, please do it somewhere else.” He doesn’t want to get caught up in this. He feels as if Honey Lemon hates him because of the fact that he’s Tadashi’s brother. You can’t hate someone for that, that’s just unfair. He feels some sort of warmth spread throughout his body as Tadashi speaks up. 

“Honey..I don’t think you understand having a younger sibling…” The older brother starts, “Having a younger brother, you know what that means? They always come first, no matter what. I have to protect him, he’s my only family left.”

 

*~*

 

After the small fight, Honey had left the house. Tadashi came up to Hiro, Hiro had his peeking out of the covers. Tadashi sits on the end of the bed, 

“Hiro…What’s wrong?” Tadashi asks him. He doesn't say anything for five minutes and he just hears his older brother start to walk downstairs to help Aunt Cass in the bakery. 

 

_“I love you.”_ He whispers and then starts to cry.


End file.
